The way the world sees you (2014) gives you a new perspective, helping you to find out what fascinates you and how you can attract others. Learn how to use personality to develop yourself, increase your chances of achieving success. Thereby, you will understand the people around you better so that you can set up your own effective working groups.
Brief about the author
Sally Hogshead is an advertising expert. She has appeared twice on NBC's Today Show and is an annual contributor to the New York Times. In the same series as How the World Sees You , Sally also wrote Fascination: 7 Actions to Persuasion and Captivation ( Fascinate: Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and Captivation.)
The book equips team-building knowledge for business leaders. Besides, the author also targets professionals who are eager to understand their own skills and employees who are having a deadlocked career.
You are only successful in your moment and a few points can tell you that
You've probably read this story already: A priceless painting is lying in a forgotten corner of Athens, dusty for decades. One day a janitor tripped over it and he brought it up for auction for millions of dollars. Have you ever felt like a painting, waiting for someone to realize your potential?
The point is, you're at the right moment when other people can recognize your unique talent and amazing qualities. For example, Joshua Bell - the most famous violinist in the world, needs his moment.
He participated in a real test. He disguised himself as an unknown person and played on the subway. There, most people were so caught up in the daily routine that they didn't pay any attention to Joshua's talent. At the end of the day he only made $32.12 – a meager amount compared to his solo performances at major shows ($45,000).
Whether the priceless painting, Joshua or yourself; True value will never be discovered unless placed at a specific moment. So continue to be patient and look for the moment when you shine the most.
Luckily, there are always signs to let you know if it's your moment or you're already there. For example, your boss actively approaches you to ask for your opinion and ask for advice on the product or process. Another good sign is when customers sign with you instead of other competitors. This shows that they have recognized your value.
To be successful, you need to overcome distractions, competition, and the threat that you're just "normal."
There are three things you need to keep in mind to be successful.
First, you need to get over people's distractions and keep them connected to your ideas. It is very difficult to get others to pay attention to your ideas if they do not bother to listen or look at the brochure you send them. So get straight to the point and impress them from the very first moment.
Sadly, the impression is only effective for approximately 9 seconds. Therefore, if you want to make an indelible impression on others, you must act quickly and strongly. For example, when you want to sell a novel, the only way to get the publisher's attention is to start the book in a memorable and engaging way.
Second, avoid competition by creating your own brand. There are many rival businesses out there fighting each other to become the strongest in their field. No matter how hard they try, there will always be someone better than them.
Ideally, you should get rid of the thought of needing to be stronger than someone or to be the best in the world. Instead, be different and create for yourself a brand, a personal recognition value. Instead of becoming the leader in the world of romance, why don't you try to use plot writing, strange topics to attract readers. Simply because you are different.
Finally, don't be seen as a commodity.
Commodities are replaceable, so if you're already considered a commodity, you're completely lost and you'll lose your customers to your competitors. To achieve lasting success, you need a loyal customer base, otherwise you'll just waste your time finding new customers. To entice customers, don't turn into a commodity, become someone special to them.
When you're hooked, that's when you're at the top
Is there anything in your life that is capable of attracting you, making you forget about everything around you?
Charisma allows you to have a steady flow of thoughts, aka into the ZONE. It's a state of mind where you can focus completely on something. The more you are drawn to that thing, the higher your chances of getting into the ZONE.
According to the definition of psychology, ZONE is a psychological state in which all your actions will be immersed in the flow of emotional energy. You are fully focused on what you do. The period of entering the ZONE is when your productivity is at its peak.
Entering ZONE is when you are completely immersed in what you are doing happily and without compulsion. It could be as simple as solving word puzzles, doing carpentry or talking to friends. To study ZONE, scientists compared brain activity between professional golfers and their apprentices while simultaneously imagining themselves hitting the ball. As a result, even in the imagination, professional players have a much higher ability to concentrate.
If just one small problem has forced you to think hard, the larger workload will only make you more stuck. But once you're hooked on what you're doing, you'll enter the ZONE and your brain always leaves some excess energy to face the challenges that arise.
Charisma is contagious. Have you ever felt that an actor or musician would reach the pinnacle of their performance if they collaborated with the top actors in the field? That's because everyone is drawn to the music or the movie, they spread the attraction to each other.
Sense of attraction is a strength
When you were a child, were you ever scolded for doing something so natural? Maybe it's because you're a bit bossy, cautious, or hyperactive. But it is these personality traits that give you immense power, which makes you attractive.
There are seven attractions (to be explained in the next chapters) and each is a unique way for you to improve yourself.
A lot of people try to reach a certain role model – try to get a job or settle into a place that doesn't fit them. To avoid that, you need to know at least one or two of your charms to find a job that appeals to you and matches your personality.
Plus, understanding the personalities and attractions of others allows you to assign the right tasks to each individual, building a strong and productive team.
Passion is for people, mystery is for data
Do you know energetic and sociable people? Those are the people who are always trusted and they are like magnets that draw people closer. If you know these people, it's likely you'll know people with passion – they're friendly, emotional, and connect with people very quickly.
Permanently among these people is an abundant source of energy, they are always enthusiastic about ideas and projects. And that enthusiasm is contagious. Besides having good social skills, they often rely more on intuition than on hard facts, which sounds ridiculous but it works better for them.
People with high passion often speak very well and form lasting relationships with customers. Although they find it difficult to suppress their emotions, their openness helps them to convey messages and convince customers.
The opposite of the above group are the mysterious people. They are usually calm, watching and listening before they speak. This group of individuals do not openly express their feelings and do not be surprised if they refuse to attend a karaoke session or certain party. They simply don't feel right.
In return, the mysterious group has a very good analytical mind and time management. They make rational decisions, they are capable of developing algorithms and trading strategies based on data analysis.
Mysterious personalities make experts, if you are looking for the right person for a research position, go to the IT department or the economic institute, you don't have to go far.
Prestige helps us to go far, prudence helps us to focus on details
When you complete a project, how often do you feel that you could have done better?
Prestige is the struggle to reach perfection and human desire. The most critical driver of prestige is to exceed normal expectations. Whether it's a contractor project, running a marathon or throwing a party, "good enough" is never an option for them. Perfectionists never accept anything second-best.
When a reputable person gives a presentation, their speech is always well prepared:
First, they will study previous successful presentations. Then they will stand in front of the mirror and practice. Finally, after the presentation is over, they will learn from their experiences, reflect on their mistakes, and make progress.
To go into even more detail, no one can beat the cautious. Prudence is a key element in making a perfect project manager.
They are always on time, don't overspend and pay attention to details as small as a crack. If someone has an appointment with you and they text you that they will be 5 minutes late, it shows that they are cautious. Doctors are a prime example of this virtue, they never ignore any symptoms of the patient.
The last two points of attraction, improvement and trust
In Mesopotamia, around 3500 BC, a man came up with a very clever idea. It was the first wheel. At the time, we didn't know what an invention was, so we can assume this person was innovative.
People who like to innovate are always creative, they come up with new ideas and come up with ways to destroy them. As leaders, people with this trait focus on the big picture, they reinforce the vision for the whole team, and build the details up to specific members. They have similarities with cautious people, only the details they notice are often greater.
And if you're looking for someone to trust, find someone who makes you feel that way. It's good to have someone on the team to trust, because they will certainly work hard and try to get the job done on time. If given a task, you can rest assured that they will complete it.
For example, your classmates get good grades even though they hate the subject. They are people who have the ability to reduce their ego to get the job done, no matter what. Besides, they will always be in class or office at the same time, every day, never late for a deadline.
My words to readers
There are seven attractions, covering the entire human personality that help us do our best and inspire others. Each individual will possess from one to two attractive points or more. Determine what your attraction is, so you can understand yourself better and be more successful.